Soot Stalking
by T0PH4T
Summary: Bleiss: Weiss, but with a black color scheme, a foul mouth, and an insatiable lust for Jaune. Now what about Soot Schnee, Bleiss's older sister?


"Aw hell, my sister's coming."

Ruby blinked and looked up from her homework. "Is that a problem?"

Bleiss started tapping furiously at her scroll, eyes showing an uncharacteristic focus. "You bet your ass it's a problem. I'm going to be playing babysitter from when she touches down to when she takes off."

Ruby tilted her head. "You, a babysitter?" she asked doubtfully. It wasn't that Ruby had no confidence in her partner. It's just that... she didn't trust Bleiss to behave responsibly if it wasn't actually a life-threatening situation. Yeah. That's it.

Bleiss rolled her eyes. "Trust me, if I could avoid it, I would. On the other hand, Daddy dearest has cut me off and Ironwood pays the big bucks for a few hours of peace and quiet," she said, poking the screen one last time. "And... done. General Ironwood's gonna owe me the big bucks for this."

"General Ironwood?" Blake said quizzically, startling the two other girls. "Since when have you been on speaking terms with a General of Atlas?" she asked, walking across the room to sit down on her bed, eyes focused on Bleiss.

"Since I managed to talk Soot down from taking a contingent of Specialists to capture her one true love," Bleiss answered, slipping her scroll into a pocket. "He offered me hella dough to be her handler, but a few days of big sis is more than enough for me."

"So crazy runs in the family," Yang commented, walking in behind Blake and smirking. "Man, what are your parents like?"

"A nun and a humanitarian, bitch," Bleiss snapped, glaring at Yang. "Also none of your damn business."

"Oookay," Yang said, eyeing the heiress carefully as she lifted her hands defensively. "Not going to touch that one with a ten-foot pole" An awkward silence descended, the four girls looking between one another without meeting their eyes. Yang sighed and shook her head. "Only girl who can talk on the team," she whispered before raising her voice and putting on a smile. "So, what's she like?"

Bleiss raised a finger to respond, paused, then brought it to her mouth, face drawn tight in concentration. After a moment she spread her arms and shrugged. "It'd be easier to show you big sis than try to explain it. I'm going out to meet her pretty soon, wanna come?" Yang opened her mouth to reply, but got beat to the punch by her sister.

"Yay! Meeting family!" Ruby said, leaning over to hug the heiress and drawing out an indignant squawk from her. "I'll ask Uncle Qrow to come along too! He's the bestest uncle there is! This is going to be great!"

"Geroff!" Bleiss said, prying at her partner with both arms before sending a pleading glance to Yang. "Help me get your sister off!" Yang's grin went from amused to shit-eating.

"I didn't know you swung that way, Bleiss," Yang said, tapping her chin and exchanging a look with Blake, even as red eyes flashed with anger. "And I don't know, you two seem like you could use some private time." After send Yang a look that promised damnation and hellfire at a later date, Bleiss turned to her other teammate in desperation, even as Ruby snuggled closer.

"-and we can have little sister parties where we complain about our older sisters and say mean things about them and paint our nails and talk about cute boys and it's going to be GREAT!" she finished, looking up at the older girl with nothing but genuine glee in her eyes. "Whatdya say Bleiss? Sound like fun?"

"Blake, I'll buy you porn! As much as you want!" Bleiss said, a note of panic creeping into her voice. "Just help me escape!" Golden eyes narrowed at the comment and Blake adopted a pensive expression, sickeningly concerned.

"I seem to recall you saying something about being cut off from money," she said, far too sympathetic to be genuine, even as Bleiss grew paler. "I wouldn't want to stress your finances at such a critical time," Blake added apologetically, a flash of amusement appearing in her eyes, just long enough to let Bleiss know that she knew exactly what she was doing. "Come on Yang, we should get going. Don't you have that thing to get to?"

"Traitorous cunts!" Bleiss called after their retreating forms. "I'll remember this!"

The door closed, the lock snapped shut, and Yang and Blake looked at the wooden barrier with pride. Then they turned around and started walking down the hall, giggles tumbling from their lips.

"How late do you think she's going to be?" Yang asked, wiping a tear from her face. Blake shrugged, still grinning like the cat that ate the canary.

"Fifteen, twenty minutes?" The door shook as something heavy crashed into it, causing both girls to jump. "Maybe more," she amended as the two started walking away, leaving the cussing and squealing behind them.

* * *

"Is she going to be a bigger you?"

"No."

"She is taller, right?"

"Yes."

"And is she-"

"YES. My _twenty-something_ sister has more curves than me!" Bleiss said, whirling around to stare at Ruby. "Now if you'd stop fucking asking me about her every five fucking seconds maybe I could get us there in less than an hour!"

The other girl shyed back, hands held up defensively. "Okay okay! Bad Bleiss protocols enacted!"

"Bad Bleiss?" the heiress hissed, stepping closer to her partner and looming as best she could. "I. Am. Perfection. Bitch!"

"I would have to disagree, sister dearest," a sensuous voice called out. "Such a title is far too complex to be applied to a single being." Bleiss froze, features changing from furious to horrified.

"Uh, hey Soot," Bleiss said slowly straightening up and adjusting her posture, eyes locked forward. "How're you doing?" Ruby stared at her partner, who was uncharacteristically still, then peered around her.

Sex. That was the first thing Ruby thought of when she looked at Bleiss's sister. Not because Soot was stark naked, or because she made Ruby (who wasn't quite sure if she wanted icky person germs yet) a little weak at the knees. It wasn't the black and red uniform that managed to enhance _everything_ without showing skin, or the artfully draped black hair that fell past her waist.

No, it was the _confidence_ with which she moved, the utter lack of hesitation in her gaze as she appraised Ruby from head to toe and drew a blush to the little girl's face, the way she never looked at the ground in front of her as she stepped up behind Bleiss, absolutely sure of herself. It was the way she leaned down, red eyes locked onto Ruby's silver ones, and made Ruby remember all those things Dad said about bad boys and girls and how they were no good in the long-term but great for a night of fun.

"My my, who is this?" Soot asked, reaching up to caress one of Ruby's cheeks. "Your partner? Please, introduce me." The last two words came out as a purr, drawing a whimper from the younger girl. Bleiss worked her jaw, brows furrowing.

"Don't play with my teammate. She's not interested," Bleiss said through grit teeth. "Now, wanna get some coffee?"

"Only if you bring this one with you," Soot said, gesturing with a single finger towards Ruby, who had recovered enough of her faculties to start stammering incoherently and shake her head. Bleiss sighed.

"Of course," Bleiss replied, resigned. "She did want to meet you." When Ruby looked at her, betrayal etched into her face, Bleiss mouthed 'play along.' After a moment, Ruby nodded. Soot stood back up and chuckled lightly, turning away and walking off.

"Wonderful. Simply wonderful."

* * *

"Ugh, this is why I don't have kids," Qrow muttered, rubbing his forehead as he looked down at his scroll, trying to decipher his niece's directions. Left at the statue. Which one? The one with a sword. Which one!? Ruby was a good kid, sometimes the best when Yang went off and did something so batshit crazy that she had to call him to bail her out and lost best niece privileges, but Ruby could get lost in an empty room.

He did eventually manage to find them. In between asking her for clarification, he got a running commentary on the meeting between Ruby's partner and her sister. Something about babysitting, a bigger Bleiss, and getting coffee. If he remembered right Bleiss was the rude one, who swore like a sailor and was lewd as the day was long. Qrow smiled. It was good to know someone on his niece's team knew how to have a good time. Maybe she could get Yang to back off a bit, let Ruby spread her little wings. She sounded like a lot more fun than the other team member, what was her name? Break? Bleak? Blake? Yeah. That last one. A real stick-in-the-mud, who was always ranting about this issue or that, sounded like a hardass.

Qrow turned a corner and caught sight of his niece, who was sitting at a table with two others. Soon enough silver eyes locked onto his and her knelt down, long experience telling him what was next.

"Uncle Qrow!" Ruby shouted, blurring towards him in a flash of rose petals. When the impact came he spun with it, bleeding off the momentum. Took a while to learn how to catch a speeding Ruby, but once you did you never forgot. Girl always greeted people with a hug at the maximum speed they could stand. After some brief wrangling her got her in a headlock and started giving her a noogie.

"Brat. What've I told you about charging Huntsmen?" he said, grinning all the while. Kids. Great for someone else to have. Ruby tapped at his arm three times, batting at him with his other hand as she gasped.

"Uncle! Uncle!" she said desperately, and Qrow only grinned back.

"I'm right here, why're you calling my name?" he teased before releasing her. Once Ruby had her breath back, she grabbed his arm and started dragging him towards the table.

"'C'mon, Bleiss's big sister is here and I need her to talk to you instead!" Ruby said. Qrow blinked, even as he stumbled along.

"Run that by me again, Rubes?" he asked, eventually making his way into a chair and examining the other people at the table. Black hair, red eyes, black and red clothes, the two definitely looked the part of sisters. The larger one was a knockout (and damn those legs) but also probably a few decades too young for him. Fuckin' Semblance. The smaller one had a scar over one eye and gave him a once over. He spread his arms, smirking.

"See somethin' ya like?" he asked, tilting his chin at her. The girl (Bleiss?) rolled her eyes. Yup, the surly one.

"Ruby talks about Drunkle Qrow all the time and I thought you'd sweat booze and sneeze meth," she said, causing him to raise his eyebrows. Sure he had a flask and sure it was empty at the end of the day but damn. He figured his own flesh and blood would be a little more gentle.

"I'm hurt," Qrow replied, putting a hand over his chest and masking his distress with a grin, leaning forward. "Anyway, you're Rube's partner, right?" Time for the first degree.

"She sure is!" Ruby said. Bleiss shrugged.

"It's more of a host/parasite relationship," Bleiss said. Ruby squeaked in indignation and Qrow laughed. Yeah, that seemed like a good start.

"Sounds about accurate. Anyway, who's-"

"Soot Schnee. Should you prove sufficiently competent, I'd like you to mate with me," the woman said, setting her cup to the side and staring at him expectantly. Bleiss's eyes went wide, Ruby's jaw dropped and Qrow's brain short circuited for a moment.

"Um, what?" he asked, scratching his head and trying to get his mind out of the gutter. "Think I heard you wrong-"

"Sex," she said, tearing away the last shreds of denial, looking Qrow dead in the eye. "I understand that there are several training arenas and many empty dormitories nearby. Our younger relatives can entertain themselves on their own and I have no pressing appointments for another seventeen hours. Would you care to spar, then couple?"

A glyph formed under Soot and she shot backwards, eyes wide with surprise. Qrow felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see another pair of red irises, though these ones belonged to Bleiss.

"Bitch, run!"

* * *

"You have no idea how good it is to be able to talk to you like this, Glynda," Ironwood said, sipping from his coffee and sighing in contentment as he placed the cup down. "Peace. Quiet. Simple, platonic relations with another woman."

"I wasn't aware that such things were an issue for you, James," Glynda said, stirring her tea and arching an eyebrow. A dark look fell across his face as James stared into the brown liquid.

"They shouldn't be. Soldiers should follow orders quickly and professionally. They should refrain from deliberately sexualizing decidedly _nonsexual_ actions as a way of fraternizing onto their superior officers, _and they shouldn't show up at one in the morning at your office wearing nothing but black ribbon!_ " James finished, face twisted into a snarl and voice low and dangerous. The mug's handle broke with a sharp _snap_ , startling both of the adults. After glaring at the ceramic in his hand for a moment, he placed the fragments onto the table and carefully folded his hands. Glynda looked from the broken cup to his carefully schooled expression, then placed her own drink down and stared at him.

"You said you had something to discuss," she asked, keeping the worry out of her voice. Ironwood nodded once.

"You see, of late I have found that some of my underlings lack the necessary discipline to properly carry out their duties. In the interest of rectifying that, I would like-"

"Hi Jimmy bye Jimmy," Qrow blurted out as he ran by the two of them.

"Sorry Miss Goodwitch!" Ruby said, flashing past them in a storm of red rose petals.

"Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck!" Bleiss shouted, a black blur propelled by glyphs.

"Your ass is mine!" a final figure howled, somehow moving faster than any of the previous three targets. "I _will_ bear your child!" Glynda gaped in astonishment as Ironwood went ashen.

"Her sister was supposed to reign her in," he muttered, one hand going up to touch the side of his head. "It was supposed to be a peaceful day. Relax, they said. Everything will be fine, they said."

* * *

"Why the fuck is your sister so batshit crazy?" Qrow shouted, jumping over a pitch-black Beowulf and ducking under a swarm of Nevermore. "And if she wants some lovin' why's she tryin' to kill me?" Two quick swings took care of another summon, but there were simply too many. Fortunately, he had help.

"Fuck if I know!" Bleiss said, spearing a Boarbatusk through the eye, her own crimson orbs darting around, looking for her next target. "She's been like this ever since she started dating! Fuckin' Dad sent her to Ironwood to learn how to be less of a whacko!"

"You're tellin' me this is an improvement?" Qrow asked incredulously, temporarily catching his breath behind a stone pillar as Bleiss did the same. Ruby had disappeared to fetch reinforcements. That's what they wanted to believe, anyway. At this rate neither of the combatants would've blamed her for just getting while the getting was good.

"Oh yeah. She's starting with the baby punches. If she really wanted your dee, she'd be fighting you one-on-one right now," Bleiss said, reloading her Dust rapier and snapping it shut. "She could take me out of the fight anytime she wanted if she was really trying."

"You are correct, sister dearest," a smooth voice said. Bleiss froze, then slowly turned around. A taller woman looked down at her, smile far too innocent for the smoulder in her eyes.

"Now, if you would be so kind as to leave the rest of the hunt to me alone, it would be much appreciated," Soot said, placing a gentle hand on Bleiss's shoulder and gazing hungrily at the Huntsman behind her. "The adults need some intimacy," she growled, pushing Bleiss away and pulling apart her blades.

"See, I'd be a lot more on board with that if you weren't tryin' to kill me right about now," Qrow said, lifting Harbinger into a ready stance and narrowing his eyes. "Most flirtin' ain't done at sword-point."

"Ah, but how else am I to ascertain whether or not you are worthy?" Soot said, falling into guard, one leg forward and both blades up. "Now then, let us engage in a more traditional courtship."

She flashed across the space between them, swords flickering high, low, and everywhere in between. They never landed though, a hair short, a second late, or stopped by a mass of steel. After the initial barrage stopped and she retreated to reset, Qrow smirked.

"That all you got?" he taunted, pointing his sword at her. "Think my niece put up more a fight the last time we spared." As Soot opened her mouth to answer, a boom echoed out and she stumbled back, clutching at her shoulder as her face twisted in pain. Qrow laughed, sword splitting and shifting, handle extending and blade curving, until Qrow was holding a scythe across his body, smirk now a full-on grin. "C'mon, you can do better than that."

With a predatory smile, Soot charged back in, blades flashing down, even as Qrow's own weapon came up-

"Specialist Schnee, stand down."

"Qrow, restrain yourself!"

-and stopped as the two combatant turned towards the voices. General Ironwood and Glynda Goodwitch strode across the courtyard, the first resigned and the second furious.

"What were you two thinking?" Glynda asked, eyes blazing with anger. "Discharge of weapons in public, reckless endangerment of civilians, destruction of school property involving students-"

"She started it," Qrow interrupted, pointing to the woman in black. When Glynda gave him a flat look he shrugged. "Listen, I know I say that a lot, but it's the truth this time."

"Specialist Schnee, what, precisely, did you say to this man?" Ironwood said, exhaustion bearing down on him. Soot slipped her two blades back together, sheathed the sword, then stood to attention.

"I was having a conversation with my sister and her partner when Qrow showed up. After a brief moment of reflection, I decided to suggest the idea of sharing a bed," she said, voice even and calm. Glynda's eyes snapped to the other woman, but Ironwood just stared on impassively. "My darling sister sent him flying away, so I pursued. With prejudice."

"You attempted to chase down Qrow for- for-" Glynda said, unable to finish the thought. Soot raised an eyebrow.

"For recreational purposes. While you may have forgotten the feeling of having a warm body writhing beneath you, I can assure you that it's quite pleasurable," the younger woman said lightly, causing Glynda to narrow her eyes.

"Are you insinuating what I think you're insinuating?" Glynda asked coldly, knuckles going white.

"Specialist Schnee, this is no way for an officer in the Atlas Military to behave," Ironwood said sternly, stepping between the two woman, then looking to Qrow. "Furthermore, it was also inappropriate of you to tempt my soldier like that."

"Come again?" Qrow said, sword falling as he looked back in confusion. "I just walked up to the two of them and talked with her sister."

"As a result, I'm calling in my favor with Ozpin and having the two of you assigned as teachers to Beacon for the foreseeable future," Ironwood said, acting as if he hadn't heard Qrow. "In order to maintain group cohesion, I demand that the two of you reach some level of mutually acceptable cooperation before you can return to field duties."

"Now wait just a minute-" Qrow started, stepping forward and raising a hand.

"I am more than content with this," Soot interrupted, grabbing his wrist and smiling without showing any teeth as she eyed him up. "It will be a pleasure working with you, Mr. Branwen." Ironwood sagged with relief, a small smile finally gracing his features.

"She's someone else's problem now," he muttered. Goodwitch grit her teeth in anger.

"I _will_ be discussing this with Ozpin," she said darkly, spinning on her heel and stalking off, crop waving around and slowly repairing the courtyard. Qrow stared at the man who betrayed him.

"Jimmy, you son of a bitch," Qrow murmured as he twisted his wrist out of Soot's grasp, slowly stepping back. "You cold-hearted son of a bitch." Ironwood looked back to Qrow, still smiling.

"Better you than me," he said as Qrow turned around and walked away, Soot following close behind. "Better you than me."

Off in the distance, two girls looked at one another, then to their relatives, then back to one another.

"Fuck."

* * *

"These will be your quarters," Glynda said, gesturing to the small apartment. "I hope they will be satisfactory." To her credit, the older woman's face was set in granite, betraying no emotion other than generic disappointment.

"More than enough," Soot said, glancing around and dropping her bags on the floor. "Out of curiosity, how thick are the walls?" The mask didn't change, even if the leather of the crop creaked as pressure on it increased.

"Thick enough," Glynda replied. When that failed to excite a response, the deputy-headmistress sighed and shook her head. "If I may ask, why Qrow? He's a drunk with more problems than relatives, and if you knew a little about his past you'd know that would be saying something." Soot raised an eyebrow at the comments, setting her suitcases to the side and sitting down on the couch, propping up her head on one arm.

"I look for what is good in a partner, not what is wrong with them," Soot said, the flirt gone from her voice. "Where you see drunkenness, I see an attempt at dealing with grief. Perhaps not ideal, but it shows some level of tendency towards action rather than passivity. That, and he seemed functional in the brief time I saw him. He is a licensed Huntsman, so his competency and likelihood of dying prematurely is less of a concern than it would be otherwise. Our little spar only further confirmed that. Furthermore, he works at a school and adores his nieces, showing great skill with children." Soot shrugged. "When examined through the lens of his strengths rather than his weaknesses, he appears to be quite the catch." Glynda opened her mouth to object, then paused, and nodded, conceding the point.

"But still, when did you learn that?" Glynda asked, sitting down across from the younger girl. "I was unaware that Ironwood had files on Valeian Huntsmen."

"He doesn't," Soot answered, lifting her scroll and displaying a dossier that should've been secure. "Vale does, and in my spare time I look into those who could make for exceptional partners. I found him, Ironwood was in the area, so I decided to try and get myself stationed here." Glynda shook her head, unconvinced.

"Even if you have high standards, there must be hundreds who fit your search criteria," Glynda said, leaning forward and making eye contact with Soot. "Why pursue him?" she pressed. Soot smiled.

"That's actually quite simple: he's my type," she said, eyes glazing over as they imagined a different place, her thighs rubbing together and hands settling in her lap. "Tall, dark..."

" _Avian_..."


End file.
